adventures of a psychopathic magnet

I Met The Neighbors

Willie and I decided to start gin & tonic Thursdays. This week we had not only G&T Thursday and G&T Friday.
So last night we sat out on my front porch, Kiyomi, Becca, Willie and I drinking, dancing, singing and whatnot.
Around 9.30, 10 a taxi pulled up. Out sprang a man armed with a bunch of flowers. He made a mad dash across the street and up the front steps of the duplex across the street. He rang the doorbell, knocked, looked for the spare key, all to our amusement, before jumpming back into the cab and driving away leaving the flowers on the front porch. Becca, Kiyomi and I casually strolled across the street to take a look at the flowers we asumed he left for his angry girlfriend. They were very nice. We sat back down on my porch and realized that we didn't look to see if he left a letter or note or something. So we sauntered back across the street, nothing.
An hour or so goes by during which Hazel joins us and quickly catches up with those of us who are drinking, we have a dance party to the Dandy Worhals, Hazel went up to Safeway for the express purpose of buying a brownie and returned with two bags full of stuff and then it happened. The taxi returned. We quickly filled Hazel in on what had happened and took our spots to see what was going to happen.
After another mad dash across the street the man produced a key and ran into the house leaving the door open. but oh no! He forgot his flowers! So Hazel and Becca decided to go over and give him the flowers. So we all snap into ninja mode, Hazel and Becca go up to his door while Willie hides behind a tree, Kiyomi hides behind a bush and I hide behind a tree, then a bush, then the wall of my front porch. Hazel rings the bell, nothing. She knocks, nothing. So she opens the screen door and peeks in. Not seeing anyone, she turns to Becca "I am just going to leave these here" turns back to the door and places the flowers inside on the floor, looks up to see my neighbor watching her. RUN AWAY!! She runs down the steps across, the street and joins me in my hiding place, as do Willie and Kiyomi. We peek over the little wall to see what is going on and notice that he is sitting there talking to Becca. Gradually we all stand up and mosey across the street where we introduce ourselves and explain (or as much as you can under such circumstances) what is going on. His name is Justin, he is very drunk and finds the whole thing just as funny as we do. He explains that the flowers are his roomates (its her birthday) and that he was locked out so had to go back to the bar to get the key.
Around midnight it is time for Becca to go home. Originally Willie was going to give her a ride but he has had far too much to drink to be driving, in fact he offered me a ride home, which i must say, would have been interesting. So Kiyomi agrees to drive her home. We once again ninja move our way across the street to my house. As we are saying goodbye we see Justin run down his front lawn, hide behind a tree, cross the street, hide behind another tree then run up my front steps where he proceeds to throw a flower at us before we all keel over laughing.
While kiyomi and Willie escort Becca home Hazel and I invite Justin to hang out on our side of Downing street. A few minutes later a taxi pulls up carrying his roomates. Naturally we all hide on my front porch and decide to fuck with them. Because this is the first time Justin and I have met, they think he has drunkenly taken over my front porch. And so starts the introductions and the telling of what has, to us anyway, become a very amusing story indeed. The next thing you know we are back at their house for drinks. Kiyomi and Willie rejoin us. There are digereedoo (sp?) lessons, the one woman flirts with willie hardcore, much to the amusement of Kiyomi and I.
After awhile we go home. And that my friends is how I met my neighbors.

posted by lulu @ 6:38 PM